Category Archives: Random Thoughts

Mar 12 2012

A price to pay when they misbehave

newprofilepic The years within a family unit is when children develop all their life skills, they learn their fears and learn how to relate to authority as well as peers.  In school they learn some of these skills but usually the main influence on their world view and their capabilities to relate with the world comes from their parents and siblings. This is why parenting is an important skill to learn and usually is learned on the job so to speak. Children have to learn that the world isn’t always fair and that to get something they have to either work hard to or trade something of equal value to get it. One of the most important rules of life they should learn during their childhood is that every they take has either a consequences or reward. Too much of the present youths out there today have little discipline nor do they have any idea about what consequences they may have to pay for breaking rules or laws. They usually learn too late and repeat the mistakes many times before figuring it all out.  As the bible says spare the rod and spoil the child, not that I am condoning child abuse or whipping a child to death but there has to be consequences to bad behavior or the child might grow up with some major issues. There are many non violent ways to teach them right from wrong and that there is a price to pay when they misbehave. What works for one child may not work for another and its one of those you have to figure out the best way for yourself kind of things.

I also find it kind of interesting that now most schools teach our children that there is no losers just the big winner and the next winner and so on. If they don’t learn to face that sometimes you just lose they will be quite emotionally challenged when they move out and have to face the real world. Losing teaches you how to be humble and it also builds character. It also makes most people want to try harder to succeed at the next try. But if there is no winner or looser then what is there to inspire them to try harder and soar higher in their lives? Yes it is not so fun loosing, I had to deal with that quite a bit through life but I also have experienced winning and usually it was because I was moved to do better by a previous failure. I think political correctness is becoming to important and we all are getting too carried away with it. Sometimes you hurt someone else’s feelings or they hurt yours, that’s part of life. The pain is short-lived and if you are fairly secure in yourself then you don’t let it bother you or slow you down. We should teach self-confidence and good self imagery in our school system and promote compassion towards others.

 

Just a few thoughts I had, right or wrong it is the way I see it.

Raymond Barbier

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Mar 4 2012

God does not create ugliness, he only creates things of beauty and purity.

eye  It seems the old dilemma of if one is good-looking or not still weighs heavy on our children and even some adults. We as a species are obsessed with physical beauty and perfection, this leads to so much self-esteem  / worth issues. God made us as we are and God does not create ugliness, he only creates things of beauty and purity. Mankind creates the ugliness in the world as well as the illusion that one body type or face type is prettier than another. Go made each one of us in his image, and god is not ugly so neither is any one of us. Yes beauty is in the eye of the beholder so we may find one type more attractive than another. The problem is in modern society we are bombarded with what someone else believes is pretty, sexy or perfect so much that we can not have our own version of what is hot or not. I guess even before television and photography there was some worries about such things as physical beauty but it wasn’t so wide-spread and usually didn’t cause so much low self-esteem / worth.  We seem to get so hung up on what other people think about our appearance and about us as an individual and this keeps us from accepting ourselves as we are. What other people think may matter, but only to a small degree. What we think about ourselves is what really matters in the end. For physical beauty fades with time but inner beauty and our personality is what remains basically the same throughout life. The truth is that not everyone will think you are physically attractive or like you, but those who matter will and that is what counts. One person may think your ugly but the next may think you’re the best thing since sliced bread. So don’t fret over what others think about your appearance or if they like you are not. Just worry about what you think about yourself and try to live happily. Teach your children to love and accept themselves for who and what they are. Teach them to think good about themselves and not to worry about the opinions off others.

 

 

 

 

 

“God made you, so you must be beautiful and a great person.”

Raymond Barbier.

 

God Bless…..

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Feb 20 2012

Which way Will you Choose?

012  The Bible teaches that love is one of the greatest things, It heals, nurtures, guides and bonds us as humans. Jesus taught us to love one another and he asked us to do it in the same way he loves us. Unconditionally, fully and without any hesitation is how we should love one another. Love is limitless but unfortunately mankind’s capacity to find excuses why not to love each other is also limitless. It so much easier to remain closed up and hidden from the world around us than it is to open up and love everyone and thing in the world. When you open up to love you leave yourself open to be hurt and that fear is what stops love from manifesting in both in our individual lives and in this world we live in. The benefits of loving and being love is worth the risks involved, when your closed you miss out on so much of life and the happiness it can bring.

Being heartbroken is an emotional rollercoaster and can be quite devastating if you allow it to be. Eventually the pain fades and happiness returns and you open back up to the love that is all around you. Life will not always be a rose garden but it is far better when you are open to love. Love comes abundantly to those who give love freely and fear fades once it is faced. The choice to love, be loved and to be happy is your choice to make or not. You can give in to fear, cynicism and anger or you can embrace love and all its wondrous benefits.

Which way Will you Choose?

“As long as your still breathing there is always a chance to change the path your on.”

Raymond Barbier

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Feb 9 2012

beyond the trap of following the social ideals

newprofilepic  Low self-esteem seems to very common place in America now days, seems a good percentage of the population have little if no faith in themselves or their abilities. Some of this is created by the family environment during the early years of our social and personality development.  But it seems that he age of mass media has the greatest effect on our self image and in turn it affects our self-esteem. Being bombarded with unrealistic thin supermodel females and overly muscle-bound males would make any average man or woman feel inadequate or sub par. Too much focus has been on the physical and not enough on the actual mental and emotional side. What one looks like does not dictate who they are or what they can achieve in life. The truth is that what society considers beauty changes decade to decade. There was a time when a heavy-set woman with pale skin was considered  very sexy and tall thin men were the hot item on the market. Unfortunately we seem to always look to society to choose for us what is sexy or not. This creates a lot of self-image problems for the majority of us that are just average looking . Until either society gets real or we as individuals get beyond the trap of following the social ideals we are handed we will be dealing with a lot of low self-esteem.

The truth is each and every one of us have their own ideal of what we consider attractive and/or sexy.  Not all men like skinny model types or bombshells and not every woman wants a Weight lifter. In the end the physical beauty fades and only the personality and heart remains. So it seems we should be more concerned with what one is inside than what they look like on the outside. Though I believe we all are beautiful and that being sexy is more an attitude than a look. For god does not make ugly things, only mankind labels things as such. Is it possible that we judge others negatively in order to try to hide our own faults?

 

 

“If the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence it is only because you have not taken care of the lawn you have.”

Raymond Barbier

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Feb 4 2012

we tend to forget about those we care about along the way

oldfamIn the hustle and bustle of our modern world we tend to forget about those we care about along the way. Have you called your mom, dad, siblings or old friends? Have you told your mate how much they mean to you and how much you love them today? Have you had any quality time with your children today? When is the last time you sat down at the kitchen table and had a family meal and converse with your family about what happened today? It is so easy to allow work, stress, TV time and the everyday routine get in the way of sharing your life and time with those you love.

 

Just some thoughts for today.

Raymond Barbier

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Feb 2 2012

Change, acceptance and fear

003 Since the time we are born we sought out the approval of our family and peers, the path of life we choose to follow is heavily influenced by the opinions and attitudes of our family unit and our peers at school or work. Even though we are solitary beings in thought we tend to become attached to the ideals and values of those we are closest to. Of course we have our own personal spin on those values and ideas but the core of them were taken from the close circle of influence we have.  Good thing about human beings is they can change their core beliefs mid stream and change their direction if not their whole life path. Usually the older we get the less we look to others for approval and or acceptance and learn to be more independent in our views. Still the base core of the beliefs we had in our youth influences our lives. The dependence on the acceptance of a social group and or their approval can limit us from reaching our full potential . We wind up spending too much energy trying to make everyone around us happy as well as trying to gain their acceptance. A lot of us waste too much time trying to figure out why we are not accepted, liked or successful. We tend to believe  since we are not liked or accepted that we are either broken or something must be wrong with us. There is nothing wrong or broken within us, and usually we are more accepted and liked than we tend to perceive. Our fear and negative thoughts are blinding us to the truth that everyone is imperfect and that each one of us are both accepted and rejected by the world around us. Even the most popular people in society have those who dislike them and don’t accept them into their social groups.

I believe that we all must learn not to put so much time and energy into being accepted or liked and focus more on being the best person we can be. No matter what cards fate has dealt you in life you have the potential to be happy as well as the ability to change the things in your life that you don’t like.  Change of course is not an easy thing because the first thing you have to do is change your own mindset, you have to let go of the thoughts that make you believe your stuck or unable to progress beyond your current position in life. That is one of the hardest demons to wrestle with and usually it will not surrender easily. Once that is out of your way you just have to take the first step towards your new life. You will face obstacles and even have some set backs but you will make it to the destination if you keep determined. Self growth and self-improvement is a personal experience and there is no one out there other than yourself that can change the person you are or decide where your going in life. Others can only aid you or try to slow you down but that is all they are able to do. Don’t worry about acceptance and or social status, don’t make life too complicated and be true to yourself. Be who you are and shed the shackles of self-doubt and live for the moment as your true self.

 

 

 

 

The first step towards happiness is Self Acceptance.

Raymond Barbier

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Jan 26 2012

How The Web Killed SOPA and PIPA | TPM Idea Lab

English: www,domain,internet,web,net

 

 

 

How The Web Killed SOPA and PIPA | TPM Idea Lab

 
 
 
 
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Jan 5 2012

Think outside the box, Swim against the tide

Think outside the box, push the boundaries set by society and be the creative force you were born to be. Einstein, Edison and Tesla are some of the greatest minds known in recent history. What made them such Geniuses and creative forces? Mainly the fact they thought outside the known boundaries of logic and science. They pushed the envelope and did not get held back by the main stream scientific views of the time. Many times in our past we have had so-called truths and facts in the scientific community that if accepted and not challenged would have kept us as a species in the dark ages. Look how at one time we believed the world was flat and that the universe rotated around earth. Both ideals were so strongly believed that until a few great thinkers dared to think outside the box and beyond the borders set by their society and time to see that both were not factual at all.

It is mans ability to be imaginative as well as creative that gives him the ability to reach higher and go farther than any other species that is on this planet. Our tendency to be tribal and our unique skill of language that gives us the potential of doing such great and wondrous things. But our Societal / collective mentality can sometimes be a burden because of the cultural belief system and the boundaries it sets. Individuality is a good thing when it comes to creativity and imagination. It is hard to break away from the herd or tribal mentality, it usually comes with some ridicule along with the possibility of being looked at as a outcast. If you don’t adhere to the norm of society then you will not be accepted, but then if you discover new truths and are able to introduce them to the tribe then you will be hailed as a sort of leader. But then being accepted by ones peers may be nice it is nothing but food for the ego, and though the ego is a necessary part of ones psyche it is not the most important.

Think outside the box, Swim against the tide and walk to the beat of your own drum. Be the next Tesla,Einstein or Edison and bring light to the hidden truths and facts yet to be discovered. Debunk the false truths as well as the theories that are based on misconceptions. Utilize the full potential of what you were born with and become the person you were destined to be.

Raymond Barbier

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Jan 2 2012

Most of us are only one or two paychecks away from being homeless

015  Now that winter time is here it is time to start to think about those who are at high risk during cold and severe winter weather. Neighbors, relatives and friends that may be up in age that need to looked after during snowstorms. Simple things as getting them groceries and making sure they have adequate blankets as well as water. There is also the homeless that need warm clothing, food and blankets if not help finding a local shelter. The local shelters also need supplies including food to take care of those in need. Even if you have very little to give or you have a busy schedule you can afford to give a few minutes of your time or a few pieces of clothing you no longer need or want. You can always get your church or organization to start a food drive or campaign to aid those in need. The least one can do is drop off a donation at a local church or non profit to help. Just remember most of us are only one or two paychecks away from being homeless so with that in mind help those that are.

 

May god bless you in This new year of 2012 and may you share the blessings with others.

Raymond Barbier

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Dec 31 2011

New year, New Way?

p10174 With New Years upon us it is once again to make new years resolutions. We all could make those unrealistic promises to ourselves that we know deep in our hearts we will not even try to fulfill or even set goals that we will strive for that are impossible to reach. The sad part of resolutions such as those is that when we fail to complete or uphold them we have the sense of failure which isn’t a good thing to start the year off with. Best to either set simple and achievable goals for your new years resolutions or ones that will not bring certain failure. We all want to make a resolution that will either improve our selves or the lives of others so to start the year off with a positive note. Most change is enacted through a series of steps not one giant leap, so remember to make a resolution that can be planed out as a day by day plan. To arrive at any destination one must take the first step and be willing to follow through with every step afterwards till they reach the end. There is no shortcuts to self-improvement or change. The fist step forward usually consists of forgiving yourself of the mistakes of the past as well as the mistakes of others. If you can not leave the past in its own time then you will find it very hard to move forward if even exist in the present. Learn from your past mistakes and don’t live in their shadows for they will block the light that you deserve to live in. Start your new year off with a clean slate for both yourself and others, for each day we wake is another chance to do what is right and live in the light of our creator. For his son died on the cross and through his blood we are washed clean of our past sins so we can live free as well as seek to become more Christ like in our every day life. To feel remorse for your sins is what you do before you pray to be forgiven and not what you do after the sin is washed away. To carry the shame and pain of a past sin is to hold on to the sin itself, if you believe in the mercy of our lord then the sin is no longer yours to carry. So leave your sins of the past in the past and leave the path ahead in the hands of the lord. Forgive, be forgiven and move forward knowing that you do not walk alone in this world. One of the greatest new years resolution one can have is to surrender to the will of the Father and follow the teachings of his only begotten son. Learn to be tolerant of the beliefs of others for they have the right to choose the path they walk in life as well as the religion they practice. Just learn to love all of your brothers and sisters on this great planet earth we have been blessed to live on and cherish its beauty. No matter what resolution you make on this new year I pray that you find peace and prosperity in this new year of 2012. May our politicians wake up to see the mess that our house is in and let them find the wisdom to put aside their differences to do what is best for both our planet and our species.

 

May God bless Mankind and guide us in this new year.

Raymond Barbier

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